by Conor Boehm, Spiritual Guru
It is very easy to see the flaws in the lives of others; it can be very challenging to see the flaws in your own life. This is why we can be very quick to judge others and yet still fail to come to terms with our own demons. Negativity comes in many forms, and in the fog of our ego, we sometimes don’t realize we are being negative, even when we think we are being positive! This is an over-generalization of course, but we have all wished things were different at times in our lives. However, becoming attached to an outcome is what screws us up most in life. Life is what it is. Let it be. That does not mean to stop dreaming or hoping for and building a better future. But in order to do that, you must accept the present as it is. Make sure you take small, positive, concrete steps each day. If you never take the first step, you remain perpetually stuck in a place you do not belong. You deserve so much better, but only you have the power to change your circumstances and your life.
Be aware that negativity impacts those around you in ways that are not always obvious. If you don’t take the time to build a positive life for yourself, your misery spills over into the lives of your friends, family, and closest supporters. Even your coworkers notice it and may start avoiding you, or they become more negative in your presence. People you casually meet in the street are no different. Negative energy is contagious. Everyone is your mirror, as what you see in them a reflection of you. If you want to find happiness in life, know that it starts as an inside job before you see it manifest in the external world. Dig deep to understand what it is in others that bother you, as it will lead you to understand yourself more fully. Also, do not let others’ negativity get in the way of creating your own happiness. Do not allow anyone to convince you it is selfish to take time to create a positive lifestyle. It is not selfish to build a positive, healthy lifestyle; it is absolutely critical you do. Remember, this time spent is not only for your personal happiness, but is also related to the happiness of others in your life as well. Positive energy is also contagious!
The most liberating aspect of life is realizing where in your story you are your own antagonist. And no one is perfect, so we must always be vigilant about reassessing our life and our actions. This is why it is so important to be present. From deep reflection or from other people you may discover things about yourself that your ego or mind does not want to hear. The best thing you can do is to listen with an open heart, rather than with your defensive ego. The truth can be ugly, the truth can hurt, but it is exactly what you need to hear. Remember that change takes time, and is a lifelong, continuous process. So do not get hung up about where you wish you were in your journey (expectations), and instead enjoy where you currently are in this moment. Life IS the journey, not a destination. Do not carry yesterday’s pain with you. In fact, leave your past behind, but only after you have learned the lessons you’ve needed in order to remake yourself into who you truly are. Remember to embrace each day anew, with a smile on your face and a heart full of love.